Today's our stop for the blog tour of the debut book by Rachael Allen. 17 First Kisses is one of the contemporary books I've been waiting and I'm so happy that our blog get to be one of the participants to help welcome the birth of this book. Check out the book and the "alternate" version of the Kiss#13 below, and then be sure to enter the giveaway via the Rafflecopter. Enjoy!
Alternate Kiss #13
I thought it would be fun to show an “alternate” version of Kiss # 13 to give you guys an inside look at how the editing process works. In the original version of the scene where Claire kisses Tanner’s band mates, Seth isn't at the party and the kiss with him takes place in a separate kiss section. The party scene ends with Tanner trying to talk to Claire and her telling him “I just made out with all your friends” before flouncing out. And as she’s flouncing, she thinks about how she’s still a kiss short which leads us to…the alternate kissing scene with Seth!
Notes from my fabulous editor, Jennifer Klonsky:
[Given that she already kissed Tanner’s other friends], why is this still important? Didn’t she make her point at the party?
More about what she thinks…how revenge doesn’t always work and she ended up using the guys and hurting Seth’s feelings.
For the part where she kisses Seth - I agree that she made this point to Tanner at the party already so it seems strange that she still feels like it's important to kiss Seth too. Should I combine the sections so this kiss with Seth happens at the same time as the other kisses? And then when she sees how hurt he is she could instantly feel horrible about all the revenge kisses?
That would be awesome!
(Side note: That’s right. My editor says things like awesome and woo-hoo and uses plenty of smiley faces and exclamation points. Do you see why I love working with her?!)
So, what do you think? The fight in the middle of the band section in the old version was funny, but I love the new version so much more. It’s more emotional and I think Seth’s actions are truer to his character. I also love that it provides an opportunity for Claire to reflect more on how her actions have hurt other people, especially Seth.
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